Another year without any lover

Hello,

Holiday eh? I finally past my final exams and all the ass-ignments. Now it's time for holiday!! From December 23rd to maybe February 4th. Nice? Exactly. I'm not going anywhere near Depok for a month! Finally this year meet its end.

So, how was your 2009 people? Everyone may have different answers, but for me 2009 was awesome. Yes, even it's just another year without any lover. I opened it with someone, and i guess i'll close it with no one. It doesn't matter. Everyone have their own way, and when he find his way, i was there to congratulate :) Good luck ya jelek, May happiness always be with you and hopefully soon it will be with me too hihihihi.

Back to my 2009, i reflect what actually happened this year. I found quite many blessings here. Thank you is not enough for what Allah gave to me this year. I got accepted in my dream University, graduated on the same day with my birthday, successfully throw a blast with my Prom Committee, still this close with my bestfriends in college time (Thank you for the daily-weekly bbm Cynthia Puspitasari, Anindya Duhita, Giansyah Sergiano, Rassya Karlita, and Aldella Diah, for weekly visit on my canteen Rizkya Rahmi, for making my direct message full Winda Nur adli, for all the compliments for this blog Chunny Nachlinatawiria, and for the monthly-lovely-meeting my Happy tree friends. Sorry can't mention 28 of you. Thank you for the love that you guys spread), also got new freakin-fun-friends in Psychology Faculty (Geng Happy rocks, and i love you all, blay hahahahaha)

In 2009, i got awesome problems too. Family? Yea, it was a hard one. Though it's okay. No where on your birth certificate did it say that life would be fair, right? Life might be unfair, but there's always a negotiation. So don't worry. Everything have their ending. So did this problem, and this year. In this year, i learn that the only person that wasn't supposed to ever let you down, probably will. You can have your heart broken, or even broke others. You may fight or even fall in love with your friends, but that's life. Three words to describe it : It goes on.

In the end of this year, try to count your blessings. Thank God for every single day that you got. Say sorry for bad things you've done. Cherish every moment with your lovers, laugh often and forgive freely. Remember what Budha said, You yourself, as much as any body in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection. Love your self, more than before. 'Cause when you have a year like mine, who will love you if you not?

And since today is December 25th, i'm gladly say Merry Christmas to all my Christian friends and blogreaders. May God bless you guys, always.

By the way... here are pieces from my December,

Another Arisan at Marche Plaza Senayan.

Denia's Surprise at Campus

Magang with Super-nicey-seniors&partners in HUMAS BEM
(Special thanks to kak Nindia Nahardita as Ka Biro Humas)

How's yours? Ready to meet the (hopefully) better year? Yes. Don't forget to hope and make some resolutions in 2010. Mine? and maybe...... become a better person, with a lover.

Happy new year everyone! Thanks for a wonderful year.
Keep visit and i'll tell you anything you want me to :p
Just feel free to leave comments.

Thank you again, Clarissa Rizky Rosyani.

#letterformom

Halo lagi semuanya.

Hari ini 22 Desember 2009, hari apa? Hari Selasa. Hari libur sebelum UAS terakhir buat saya. Tapi buat semua anak di dunia ini, hari ini hari Ibu. Hari yang spesial buat semua mahluk luar biasa yang berhasil mengandung, melahirkan dan membesarkan anaknya. Sudah ucapin selamat sama ibu kamu? Saya sudah. Tapi rasanya nggak akan pernah cukup ya. Bunga dan kartu ucapan itu cuma bisa ngegambarin selamat aja. Untuk rasa sayang yang ada di hati saya ini rasanya nggak bisa digambarin pakai apapun deh.

Saya tau, mama saya nggak ngerti internet. Jadi dia nggak akan pernah buka blog ini dan nggak akan pernah liat juga tulisan ini. Tapi saya pengen nulis sesuatu untuk dia. Sekedar surat. Surat yang tak akan pernah sampai kalau kata Dewi Lestari di Buku Filosofi Kopi.

Dearest mama,

Selamat ya.

Selamat karena udah ada di dunia ini buat Icca. Selamat karena udah berhasil melahirkan tiga orang anak ke dunia ini. Selamat karena berhasil ngebagi rasa sayang dengan adil buat Icca dan Vina bahkan untuk Mas Romano di Surga. Selamat karena masih kuat untuk ngejalanin hidup yang penuh masalah ini dan selalu jadi kekuatan buat Icca. Selamat karena masih bertahan di rumah ini untuk Icca sama Vina. Selamat karena berhasil mendidik anak-anaknya dengan baik. Selamat karena rapor Vina selalu bagus dan ranking. Selamat karena berhasil bikin Icca sampai di Universitas ini. Selamat karena selalu jadi motivator paling handal buat anak-anaknya. Selamat karena udah berhasil bikin Icca percaya kalau Allah itu nggak pernah tidur, dan akan selalu jawab doa Icca, walaupun kadang jawabannya Tidak.

Selamat karena udah berhasil jadi Ibu, Kakak, Sahabat dan teman sekaligus buat Icca. Selamat karena udah selalu ada untuk dengerin cerita apapun dari mulut Icca. Selamat karena selalu berhasil marah-marah kalau Icca salah dan bikin Icca nggak mau ngulangin kesalahan Icca. Selamat karena selalu mau dikritik kalau mama ada salah. Selamat karena selalu mau mengerti semua pilihan-pilihan Icca bahkan yang mama sebenarnya nggak setuju. Selamat karena udah jadi ibu yang luar biasa buat semua anak-anaknya.

Selamat hari Ibu ya ma....

Oh iya, kemarin Icca abis UAS Psikologi Umum, ada sesuatu yang paling Icca inget, menurut Carl Rogers, ada yang namanya Unconditional Positive Regards. Keadaan dimana seseorang mencintai orang lain karena keberadaan atau eksistensinya. Mungkin itu yang bisa ngegambarin perasaan Icca ke mama. Icca sayang sama mama karena mama ada di dunia ini buat Icca. Sesederhana itu.

Sekali lagi, selamat ya ma. Terima kasih untuk segalanya. Terima kasih untuk hidup delapan belas tahun belakangan ini. Sehat terus ya ma, tunggu Icca sukses dan bisa ngebahagiain mama sama Ayah..

My sister - Me - My mom *btw, she made our clothes by her own!

I love you, yes i do

Clarissa Rizky

Be your self, everyone else is already taken

- Oscar Wilde

Hello again.

My tasks are almost done! 3 Journals left and i decided to take a break. Today i went for blogwalking, and i found a post in Ayas's blog. Feeling so lucky to have a very smart little girl like her as a good friend, she's 16 and already in college with me. One of her post contain my name, and the point is, i have succesfully motivated her. Really happy to see that. You're worthful Yas, and thanks for the compliment also :)

See? You might never realize, your simple words maybe inspire other people. It's your choice to be an inspiration or not. Keith in One Tree Hill once said, "Most people are stronger than they know. They just forget to believe in it sometimes." Well, you are strong everyone. Keep on believing! Cause we're never gonna be this young as tonite, so make every single day in your life worthful.

Say simple words, but make sure it has huge meaning. the meaning of life actually is giving life a meaning. As i said in my earlier post months ago, Say what you mean, mean what you say.

Now, Sit back and think, are you proud of the person you are today?



Personal Message :
If you're willing to chase me, I promise I'll run slow ;)

See you on my last post of the year, Clarissa

When you try your best and you don’t succeed

Hello bloggie. How’s life?

I quoted the title from ‘Fix You’ by Coldplay.

That is how i feel lately. I wrote about midterm test on the last post right? How about your score guys? I got 76 – 83. And unfortunately it’s not good enough. When you got the highest score on your class, you’ll think that you’re good enough right? But you’re actually wrong. They are 4 or more classes and maybe you are in a stupid, hm well or lefted class? Maybe it’s not that bad. But the point is here in my University or maybe yours too, we can’t easily satisfy. Lesson from this experience?

Don’t be to satisfied with your work. Look other’s but don’t get shame.

Because no one is stupid. It’s all about how you improve your competence. Since i’m studying in one of the best University in the country (no offense ;p), i saw many people who have un-smart-appearance but hell great scores. It makes me (more) believe that everyone is actually smart. It depends on how you use your brain.

It’s just another message for your study guys. I’m actually doing my final assignment(s) right now. Almost 2000 words essay based on 3 intelectual (English) journals, my own 12 (@700 words) journals, Final essay about my life, English essay and a plan for the next 4 years in college. Yes it was a task! Making my own plan for the next 4 years. Sounds silly? I know it is. It’s quite important yet not that easy to make :s

That’s why I’m writing here. Cause I’m sick for write things in so many laws. I can write freely here. Sorry if this post contain unimportant words. It’s just my way to spread all the boredom. Hhhh, it’s not easy to learn anything new, right? But actually Learning is a gift. Even pain is your teacher. And when you feel screwed, remember that we’re all living in a big wet ball floating in the dark. It’s normal and rational to feel screwed, but don’t forget to smile. Cause it’s the second best thing you can do with your mouth. (You can think by yourself which is the first :p)

I’m gonna back to my work. Final exam on Monday and so many deadlines for my final assignment. Wish me luck everyone!

P.S : Jalanilah hidup dengan senyum dan tersenyumlah untuk menjalani hidup selanjutnya (Rocky Samuel). Happy birthday Mr. Police.. As I promised you before, I wrote you words here.

Bye! Clarissa

(Cool)lege anyone?

Hello folks,
Apa kabar?

Buat angkatan 2009 seperti saya, pernah ditanya nggak "Kuliah udah belajar apa aja?". Saya pernah, beberapa kali. Terus bingung, belajar apa ya? Jadi mulai memikirkan (lebih dalam), apa aja ya yang udah dipelajarin 3 bulan ke belakang? Ternyata, banyak. Banyak sekali. Psikologi emang bidang yang saya suka, yang saya mau, bahkan yang saya impi2kan setelah mimpi jadi dokter gigi kandas setelah naik kelas IPS. Ternyata, mata kuliah disini tidak langsung seperti yang saya bayangkan. Psikologi Umum yang (terlihat) menarik saat melihat jadwal kuliah pertama ternyata sangat, sangat jauh dari yang dibayangkan. Mata kuliah itu pure sejarah, yang biasanya sih saya suka. Tapi yang ini beda. Bahannya banyaknya amit2, bukunya tebal, tulisannya kecil2, bahasa inggris lagi. Top lah. Ada juga Bimbingan Pendidikan, yang tiap minggu adaa aja tes mental. Tes IQ, multiple intelegence, minat, modalitas dan lain2. ada lagi Pemahaman diri, beneran deh kelas ini menyenangkan sekali. Setiap minggu tugasnya refleksi diri, belajar tentang emosi, komunikasi, values, interpersonal relation which are love and friendship. Terus tugasnya refleksiiiiiiiiiiiiiii terus, tulis semua pengalaman dan lain2.

Terakhir (saya nggak ngitung MPKT dan B. Inggris), Logika dan Penulisan ilmiah, lebih susah dari PsiUm. Setidaknya menurut saya. Ilmu saya selalu bertambah setiap selesai kelas LogPenil, tapi saya sendiri bingung itu mau diaplikasikan ke tugas yang mana. Saya belajar banyak dari mas Dewa, (yang kata orang sih gila) menurut saya agak sih. Dari sekian banyak yang dia omongin di kelas, ada satu statement yang masuk banget ke dalam otak saya. "Kalau baik itu positif, harusnya akhirnya juga positif." Jadi konsep-konsep yang ada di masyarakat (baca : sinetron dan teman2nya) tentang orang baik - berkorban - bahagia itu salah. Sinetron itu selalu menggambarkan orang baik itu selalu susah, lalu mau berkorban untuk orang yang dia sayang, baru endingnya bahagia kan?

Seharusnya, baik - memberi - bahagia. Kalau kita melakukan sesuatu dengan konsep memberi, kita tidak akan merasa rugi. Lalu kita akan merasa bahagia. Contohnya, ketika di bus, kita membiarkan orang tua duduk di tempat duduk kita dan merasa kita telah berkorban, berarti kita belum baik. Mestinya, kita memberi tempat duduk, lalu kita merasa bahagia karena kita tidak merasa rugi. Kalau jadi capek ya itu jelas efekf isik karena berdiri selama perjalanan. Yang dibicarakan disini masalah perasaan.

Dapat poinnya? Maaf ya kalau nggak jelas, boleh kok di skip post yang ini. Saya cuma pengen sedikit berbagi. Jadi, intinya kalau kita selalu melakukan sesuatu dengan konsep memberi, kita akan selalu merasa bahagia. Masih merasa suka berkorban? Saya kadang2 masih kok. Itu normal dan sangat manusiawi. Tapi sudah siap belum untuk menjadi (lebih) baik? :)
Sekali lagi saya cuma ingin sedikit berbagi. Maaf kalau bahasanya banyak yang salah, atau sama sekali nggak bisa dimengerti. Kapan2 saya cerita lagi ya tentang kuliah. Selamat belajar ya!
Cheers, Clarissa

The good old days weren't always good, and tomorrow ain't as bad as it seems

Hello diary.........
(i called it diary cause somehow this blog feels like one)

How was your October? I learned many things last month. For God sake it's the midterm test week(s). So i tried to study really hard, yet i don't think the result will make me smile. I also learn about choices, deeper than before. Remember about choices that i made last month? Yes, i choose for continue PDKM thingy and skipping arisan, but suddenly our regular meeting change to 24th October! I was freaking happy yet sad because it's my ex-chairmate farewell, Sasmia :( She's going to Germany last saturday to continue her education. I had a great night at Penang Bistro with my Happy Tree Friends..

Up : Arisan Mates (read : my moodchargers)
Down : My lovelovelovely ex-classmates

I choose to be there even in the next monday i'll have PsiUm Midterm test. I took a risk (maybe it's not a big risk from your point of view) but it's big for me. I came there special for my bestfriend, Sasmia also to meet my moodchargers :-) I love them one, but they gave me a thousand. P.s : Sasmia, good luck in Germany..... Don't forget to keep the frame, like i keep our friendship. I'll keep you here, here in my heart. I love you!

Do you know the difference between school and life? In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test. In life you're given a test that teaches you a lesson.

Then, it was the good thing from that my choice.
How's reality (read : college)?
I thought it will be super flat. I adore my University, i love my faculty, i like my friends, i laugh a lot there, yet somehow i feel stress. I know it's weird. I think college thingy pushes me a lot, and they took my time a lot lot lot. But at the end of the month, i realized that i already met my super-friends here. They (always) make my days better in campus.

Continue the story about some choices, i attended PDKM for 3 days at Puncak. It was my first time traveled by Economy class train! Reaaaally hectic, it was even hard to breath! But it was fun tough. 3 days there were fun, sometimes we found boring times, but thank God i got "geng happy". They always make my laugh ;) Oh yes, at Puncak there were Badan Eksekutif Mahasiswa simulation, from "Debat explore to "Rapat Kerja Tertutup". It was freakin tiring, and exciting (;p) The most surprising fact in the end is............i got accepted to "Magang" in biro Hubungan Masyakat, Badan Eksekutif Mahasiswa Fakultas Psikologi Universitas Indonesia. There were 60 people who attend PDKM, and only top 30 who got in to "Magang". And suprisingly I'm in. I only have 'suprise' to describe my feeling. I really like BEM thingy, i really interest with Biro Humas, but i'm not sure about my academic. Please, wish me luck for the next month.

Okay, this is it. It was the (very long) story about my choice that i promised you last 2 weeks. What i mean here is.........for something that you get, you lose other thing and when you lose something, you get others. That's the point of making a choice, you have to take the good with the bad, smile with the sad, and love with no regret. In the end, it is not what you've done in the past, it is how you use your past to help you in the future.

Sooo, good luck with the November guys!
My message : If you can't change reality, change your self. Make some choices, and you'll see the difference.

Last but the most important, Don't forget to pray! Allah never sleep, and always answer your prayers. Maybe sometimes the answer is NO, but don't you ever stop to pray and ask ;)

~funny picture, just to describe my feeling when i'm writing this Cheers, Clarissa Rizky Rosyani.

Have a good life, Clarissa.

At one point in your life you either have the thing you want or the reasons why you don't

- Andy Roddick

Hello! I'm back after a very hectic September. Yes Prosesi di Psikologi UI (Proses Penyesuaian diri) has done. I finally past my orientation, i got 3,76 for PMB IP ;D Too many stories i got after a month in college. Orientation was freakin tiring, even i got many lessons after that. New friends are nice, even i can't find anyone like highschool (best)friends. The assignments are too much! :"( even somehow they're fun things to do. The campus is great, even i'm not feeling comfortable yet. Can you find 'even' in my last lines? I used it almost in every lines that describe my campus life. What i mean here is i tried really hard to take anything positively in my new life, even there are many 'even' or 'but' or anything that deny my happiness here.

For me, it is not easy to get in to this new world. You can see my last posts, it's all about good bye and hello to the new chapter of life. This chapter has begun, and i find many troubles to survive. At some moments i feel tired, unhappy and want to quit. The point is, i choose to be here. And God has chosen me too. Saya memilih dan dipilih untuk bisa ada di Fakultas Psikologi Universitas Indonesia 2009. Don't you think that i'll be really arrogant if i just spend my time to mumbling? That's why i put 'even' in every line. That there's always a positive side behind everything. It's our choice to take it positively or negatively.

See? It's the matter of choice. Do you agree that life is about choices? It's sucks, i know. I hate to choose. You have to pick something that is (supposed to be) more important than others, and sometimes, it is not easy.

Why do i pick this topic? 'Cause i just did. I made a choice. I joined what they called PDKM (Pelatihan Dasar Kepemimpinan Mahasiswa) in my faculty. I thought i need some activities that make me feel (more) comfortable in campus and also make (more) friends with psychology mates. I didn't know that it'll take my time, a lot. I did think about resign. I have to concentrate with my study, get the best score, and graduate as soon as possible. Also, i desperately want to meet my highschool bestfriends. I didn't know the regular meeting will be at the end of the month, while the final of PDKM will be held on Puncak. Sucks? Yes. It is sucks to choose. After a looong talk with my parents, my (new) friends and my #1 bestfriend, i become more and more confuse. I cried. I know it sounds too much -_- But it's true. And i did sholat istikhoroh before i sleep, and when i woke up, i feel much-much better. I know what i'm doing. I choosed to stay. For some reasons that i can't explain one by one. You'll be totally bored. By the way, last month i skipped Psyhur for arisan, and this month i'm gonna skip arisan for PDKM. Next month? I'll skip anything for arisan :D Balance? Yes, i try really hard to balancing my campus life with my super-fun-highschool world.

I remember, happiness is a choice. Suffering is an option.

And have you ever heard? You can do anything, but not everything. So when life gives you some (hard) choices, think twice or even more. Choose the best for you.. And the most important :

The rest of your life is a long time. And the rest of your life starts right now.
Some people say,

Agree? I'm trying now. So i'll give you the answers maybe in the next two weeks :D

Ps : thanks to my dearest Chunny :D For all the compliments and the support hihi. Your comment about this blog, really, reaaally made my day...

Love, Clarissa

Love only as much as your willing to lose.

hello fellow!!

Like it's been reaaaaaally long since my last post. Been busy with college orientation. Now the hard one is done! Yes, i finally past my orientation week(s). Universitas Indonesia have many steps to do before we actually study. From choir week to OBM. And i finally past the hardest week, started with Pra-PSAF Psi then OKK (which is sooo unimportant. I think they don't even check our tasks, it's just nice to have new friends like Saras, Kevin and Bimo as my group mate). Continued by DEMO UKM, it's like extraculicular demontration. I watched it with Winda, Chandra , Azza, Satrio and also our new friends, finally i got lots of laugh at the campus. Then, i have to face hell. Yes, i called it hell, it's PSAF (Pengenalan Sistem Akademik Fakultas) Psikologi 2009. You know? i've been many (hard) orientations, from MOS, OK, SAMAN or even KLASSIX and GORPARTY, in highschool. Yes, i've been there. With soo many seniors, i thought it will be the same. But trust me, Psychology Faculty is way way harder. It was the longest two days in my life. But Thank God i finally past it. So you think i'm done with orientation thingy? Soooorry guys, you're wrong. My faculty still have a month for orientation. Yes, a full month with tasks and i don't what. Just wish me luck okay? I'll start my class on 31th August :)

Okay enough with my "curhat" paragraph. So, how's life on August? For anyone on my age, i think it's a busy month for college thingy aite? It's a start of something new. A new chapter of life. It's not easy aite guys? Yes, but keep your spirit and get used. Universitas Indonesia have many activities, and i tried (i swear i tried :p) to come if they told me to come. Even i think choir session is unimportant. You know why i come? I'm not a dilligent girl, just like you i like to skip class or whatever. But it's just adaptation weeks for me. I have to get used with new friends, new place (yea Depok is way way far different than Mahakam). And for sure it's not easy. When my mind got screwed, i open my daily web : Mario Teguh. Always inspire me, a lot.

Do you like to be inspired? I do. And have you ever inspire people around?

I was surprised when i got message on facebook from different contries and even region. There was a man goggled for quotes then found this blog. He said that he inspired by some of my words. You know? He really made my day. And i got junior in highschool name Andri. She's young, talented and really cute. She featured me as one of her friends on her blog. Her opinion made me smile really wide. Thank you, thank you ndri :)

I am not saying this for show of, but it's just so you know that you, yes you can inspire people. When people say who are you? I'm proud to say.So what? Just remember guys,

Okay, when reality comes to an end, it's not easy to believe. It is why i made the title "Love only as much as your willing to lose".

Just have fun, live, laugh, love, cry and die.
Cheers, Clarissa